Parenting

Every baby has a unique personality. You will gradually learn your baby's temperament and will know your baby better than anyone else. You cannot spoil your baby during the first four to six months by holding him or her too much. Babies at this age need to be held and cuddled — it helps them feel safe. Talk to your baby, he or she will enjoy seeing your face and hearing your voice.

It is crucial that you never shake your baby. Shaking or spanking a baby can cause serious injury or death. Every parent feels overwhelmed and anxious at some time. Some mothers will experience depression, most likely due to their hormonal changes. If you are a new mother and are feeling depressed, tired and are crying a lot, check with your doctor for help. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to call (415) 441-KIDS (the Talk Line) or Parents Place at (415) 563-1041.

As a parent, you have new responsibilities. Although you may not want to think about it, you should have a will so that you, rather than the state, determine who will care for your child in the event of your death.

Crying

Babies cry one to four hours a day. Sometimes they cry because they are hungry, tired, have a dirty diaper or just want to be held. Sometimes babies cry for no known reason. Many babies cry more in the early evening — just when you're trying to have dinner. Babies cry the most between the ages of 6 to 8 weeks.

For more information on crying, please see Soothing Your Crying Infant.

Feeding

Breastfed Infants

• Breastfeed your infant as often as he or she appears to be hungry. Most infants nurse every two to three hours.
• Breastfed infants usually have a bowel movement soon after every feeding.
• Mothers who are breastfeeding should continue taking their prenatal vitamins until the infant is weaned.
• Breastfed infants will get their fluoride through their mother's milk, therefore you should make sure to drink some fluoridated water daily. Brita and Pur filters do not remove fluoride.
• If you choose to express breast milk, wait until your infant is 3 weeks old before doing so.
  • You can express milk at any time — before, during, after or in-between a feeding.
  • You will need to be warm, comfortable and relaxed.
  • Stimulate your nipples to simulate nursing and promote the let-down of milk.
  • You can store milk in the freezer for four to six months in plastic or glass containers.

Formula Fed Infants

• If you are using formula, the concentrated and powdered cans are cheaper, but make sure to read the directions carefully.
• Do not force your baby to finish all the formula in the bottle.
• Do not warm bottles in the microwave.
• You may want to boil water for one minute before using it to mix the formula, but make sure that you allow it to cool before feeding it to your baby.

Safety

Preventing Infection

Babies can catch germs very easily because their immune systems are not mature. You can help your baby stay healthy by taking a few precautions:

• Keep your baby away from sick people. It is not rude to ask friends who are sick to wait to visit until they are feeling better.
• Do not take your baby to crowded areas like theaters, shopping malls and churches.
• Wash your hands frequently, especially after changing diapers.
• Don't let anyone in your home smoke.
• Breastfeeding helps protect babies from infections.

If your baby is lethargic, feeding poorly, crying unusually, has had several episodes of vomiting or coughing, or has an under-arm temperature of more than 99.5° F, call the doctor immediately.

Your baby's next checkup should be at 1 month of age.

Car Seats

Use the car seat for every ride with the infant placed in the back seat, if possible. Make sure that your infant is appropriately strapped in and faces backwards. Rear facing car seats cannot be used in a position where the airbags might inflate. Make sure the car seat is properly buckled into the car. Remember that you always need to buckle up too.

Fire and Burns

• Make sure you have a smoke detector that works properly and check the battery.
• Think of a fire escape plan for your family.
• Turn the hot water temperature down to warm or low — 120° F.
• Don't hold your baby while smoking.

Other Safety Issues

• Smoking — If you smoke anywhere in your home, you increase your baby's risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). In addition, your baby may have more colds, ear infections and perhaps asthma. Talk to your doctor about programs to stop smoking.
• Guns — If you have guns at home, consider whether you wish them to remain inside your home. If so, take the time to make sure that they are properly locked up, with the ammunition stored separately from the guns.
• Falls — Babies move quickly. Don't leave your baby alone on the bed, couch, changing table or other high places.
• Violence — Parents, especially mothers, may find themselves in a relationship that is abusive or dangerous. If you are concerned about your relationship, your safety or the safety of your child, please talk with your pediatrician, who will help you find resources in a confidential manner. To speak with someone by phone and find help near you, call 800-799-SAFE (7233) or (415) 864-4722.

Reviewed by health care specialists at UCSF Benioff Children's Hospital.
Last updated June 17, 2010

This information is for educational purposes only and is not intended to replace the advice of your doctor or health care provider. We encourage you to discuss with your doctor any questions or concerns you may have.